How to handle teenage girls and dating

“Even the word ‘rules’ tends to lead to a struggle with teenagers,” says Ponton, who has two children and two step-children, now all in their 20s.“A more successful approach comes from mutually agreed-upon guidelines.” Discuss curfew, group and private dating, whether you want to meet their date first and how they’ll inform you of their welfare and whereabouts while they’re out.Statewide, only 20 percent of kids ages 14 to 17 have had sex, according to the California Health Interview Survey.Thinking that everyone else is doing it can push kids to become sexually active too young.

Besides biology, bring up some of the risks and moral considerations.

Remind them of activities and friends they used to enjoy.

Get them to see how their life has lost balance and how it can be better.

It’s much easier to talk when your kids become teens if you began the dialogue years earlier.

“When you start talking to them about sex when they’re 11, it allows them time to figure out what’s important to them,” says Brown, who has worked with teens for 27 years and is the mother of two daughters ages 18 and 21.

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A sign that they’re ready for intimacy may be that they can discuss the risks with each other, use long-term protection and go together to the clinic to get it.

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